1) That is not cream cheese beside my bagel. It is cottage cheese.
1a) Also, that is not a bagel.
2) There is no "f" or "l" in my name.
3) Telling someone to go to a landmark and then call the car-inspection place for directions does not qualify as giving directions to the car-inspection place.
4) Even if the internet is working at your office, landlord, it can still be broken at my apartment.
5) Children do not need pamphlets about unemployment on their bookshelves.
6) If the oven takes two hours to bake cupcakes, it is broken. You do not need to come by with an oven thermometer to check it.
7) I am obviously pretending I plan to order more food when I clearly intend to sit here for hours using your internet and electricity and only order coffee. So please stop coming over every 30 seconds to check on me.